When the media reported the Myspace incident and even after Jay apologized,
I thought it was nothing, and believe soon this storm will end.
When the antis sign petition against Jay and even want him to commit suicide,
I thought this is too ridiculous, and I sense something bad is going to happen, but I strongly believe JYP is a wise man that he'll never let this talented dude leave the group just like that.
On 8th September 2009,
I woke up and saw some Twitter messages saying:
"Jay is already on the plane now, we wish him all the best."
I was totally stoned, and then I cried like no other, while updating what's going on.
On 9th September 2009,
I cried, again and again, non-stop the whole day, and my fever is not helping either.
Everything seems tasteless to me, and it's like a long day to me.
I think and think, it doesn't make sense to me, all these happened to fast. And I got a bad feeling about this, every time I thought that I'll never see Jay on stage again, my tears start rolling down again.
But I told myself, never stop fighting, something need to be done to bring back Jay. As my internet connection is suck at my area, I couldn't even got into 2PM forums and update myself about the news, and so I emailed some international forums ask whether I can help, and about K-Hottest project and stuff, but, I was being ignored.
And I'm frustrated and helpless. I really wish I'm at Korea at that moment.
On 10th September,
Again, I cried like shit and my eyes are swollen that I can't even go out and meet anyone.
My sixth sense told me that all these really don't make sense to me! This speedy leaving is ridiculous. I thought, how could one newcomer decide by his own, leaving the group just like that. I strongly believed that the company staff and the boss has the power to stop him, IF they want to. With Jay status at the company, it's really impossible for him to make big decision like this. And then, I thought again, maybe the company wants him to leave, WHO KNOWS? If I'm some money-maker company, I would also sacrifice ONE to save ALL.
But then again, I'm exhausted. By reading all the articles, fan's messages and videos, I tried to convince myself that I shall respect the so called 'Jay's decision', and I even told myself, "Let it go, just let it go. It's over already." After all, this decision is made for the sake of 2PM, he already sacrificed, and i shall respect Jay's sacrifice.
Moreover after reading JYP's letter. I was so moved by the letter and I start to cry again, and this time was the worst, I cried like I've just lost someone so important, even though, I never met this guy before. I almost lost hope on bringing Jay back, and I really scared that there is this one day that everyone, forget about this whole incident, and Jay might be forgotten. Of course I love 2PM and want them to moved on, but, Jay is the one who bring me to 2PM.. so, 7-1=0.
I'm really tired that time that I fall to sleep crying under my blanket.
On 11th September 2009,
I really don't feel like wake up, because I'm too afraid to turn on my computer, because I know I'll update myself about Jay and 2PM again. But dang, life still goes on, I woke up after lying on bed like a corpse for the whole day, and as expected, I turn on the screen.
After I read some messages posted on some websites by the so-called Jay's friend - Chico, saying: "Jay was telling me yesterday that the only thing saving his career right now are his fans."
At this moment, I stopped crying.
I decided to stand up, stand strong, because Jay need us, need our strong determination to bring him back I told myself.
Something critical need to be done, it's no use we are crying and leaving messages telling we want him back, we want him back, BUT nothing has been done, and soon after, he will be forgotten and replaced. We need to start doing something, IF WE WANT HIM BACK!
And even God is helping me, I found one of the K Hottest contact and mailed her, and now I'm here typing this to everyone out there who love Jay Park, who want him back so badly, who has been crying for days after he left us...
JAY NEED US TO BRING HIM BACK, AND ONLY US CAN BRING HIM BACK.
As far as i know, most International Hottests does not support K-Hottests boycott JYPE, even though they understand why K-Hottests are doing so, but in order not to hurt the 2PM boys any further, they don't encourage a boycott.
We too, do not want to hurt the boys, but if we continue to wait and wait and wait, and do not do something critical, the company will just ignore us, and the possibility of Jay returning is even lower. So, imafighterforjaypark will not sit back instead, stepping out and fight for Jay! :)
So, to all the Hottests who think nothing can be done, we shall respect Jay's decision, and yes, I understand people who said Jay sacrifice for the sake of 2PM and think don't boycott JYP cos it will be a burden to Jay, and alright fine, you might not understand K-Hottest for boycotting...
I say, whether it is Jay's decision or the company decision, we DO NOT KNOW THE REAL TRUTH.
Even though we are not Koreans Hottests, and what we can do is so LITTLE, we will still try our very best to fight for Jay Park!
So now, who's with us? =)